A Lust for Cis

Do what thou whilt shall be the whole of the law.

I wish I could hit reset on this life and be born as a cis girl. My life would have gone in a completely different direction but I’m ok with that.While I’ve finally gotten to a place in my life where I’m mostly ok, I would still trade all this in an instant to be cis. I hate being trans. I hate everything about it. There’s no upside. There’s no silver lining. It’s just pain. Constant horrible pain. It’s horrible and I hate it so much. Nobody would ever be trans on purpose. It’s nothing good. It feels like the gods decided to betray me before I was even born. It’s awful. There can be no wholly benevolent god in a world that’s got this kind of horror inside it. It’s fucked. Seriously fucked up. It’s awful. I’m so tired of it. I’m so fucking tired.

Love is the law, love under will.


Some Emotions Concerning Animal Crossing

Do what thou whilt shall be the whole of the law.

Animal Crossing has been one of my all-time favorite games, especially when I was younger. I played the various games an untold number of hours, especially the handheld versions.

It sucks Nintendo shut down the 3DS servers. There were so many dream towns I loved visiting in Animal Crossing. Yes, now we have New Horizons but I’ll be honest, I don’t like t as much as New Leaf. Granted, I do enjoy the new mechanics like crafting, but I still think New Leaf was the best one of the series. New Horizons is fun, don’t get me wrong, but It’s missing quite a lot of things that were there in New Leaf. I especially loved the way the town area was handled. No more riding a train there like in City Folk. It’s just to the north of your map. Club LOL was one of my favorite places when DJ KK was performing. I love how it let you dance with the + pad.

Yes, I know New Horizons keeps adding stuff, and that’s cool, but just something about the setting, the presentation, etc that I really connect with. I honestly wish Animal Crossing was a PC game that just got new updates & DLC but otherwise left the formula alone. I hate having to start a brand new town every time a new game comes out. I hate when they remove features but I understand why they do that. It’s still a good game though and I very much enjoy planing it when I do. I just feel it would be better if you could carry on things from previous games. I’m especially in love with the sound effects and music of Population Growing. They’re very nostalgic to me. It is what it is though, and Nintendo being Nintendo isn’t gonna want to change up what they’re doing when it’s working for them and the games are well worth it anyway.

There is a game called Hokko Life that’s on Steam that’s like Animal Crossing but despite owning it for awhile now and already having it installed on my Laptop, I still haven’t sat down to play it yet. Honestly I’d prefer to play it on the Steam Deck when I get one more than I want to sit in front of the computer to play it. The style of game it is feels like it should be better played on a handheld device. I love that aspect of the Switch that you can use it as both a handheld and a TV based console, but for a lot of games I prefer to use it handheld; those being cozy games primarily.

I know there’s also Castaway Paradise too but I’ve never played it either nor do I own it on Steam yet. I’m not a huge fan of the art style but I do like that it is unique. I feel like games that borrow mechanics from other games are more fun and interesting when they do their own thing and don’t try to copy it too much. That is when the developers let it be its own thing. It is interesting that Castaway Paradise was given an island setting first before Nintendo went the same direction with Animal Crossing.

There’s also Magician’s Quest: Mysterious Times which is somewhat similar of a game in terms of presentation and overall vibes but is very much its own thing. It centers around going to a school of magic. It reminds me of that one TERF franchise and I think that’s what they were aiming at. (They even included a classmate character called Neville) As you can imagine, being for the DS and not even the 3DS it’s more primitive in graphics and the like which is very reminiscent of Wild World.

Love is the law, love under will.



Do what thou whilt shall be the whole of the law.

Christianity, with Jesus and the New Testament, claims to be the updated form of Judaism. Islam, with Muhammad and his Quran, claims to be the updated form of both of them. They form a chain of succession.

The Baha’i faith claims to be the next step after Muhammad and the Quran; that of Baháʼu’lláh with his Kitáb-i-Aqdas. His holy book is largely instructional and has very little narrative. The bulk of it is made up of rules to follow.

The Faithists claim the same succession from Christianity as Islam does, but with John Newbrough and his Oahspe. It’s a pretty bizarre tome and it’s massive. I haven’t studied it in depth though I do own a copy.

Thelema falls among these as well with Aleister Crowley and his Book of the Law. It’s the succession of Islam. Crowley received The Book of the Law from the Angel Iwass much like Muhammad did from the angel Jibril.. It’s the succession of Islam. The Book of the Law and the other Holy Books of Thelema are the new holy book for the new æon; the æon of Horus, the crowned and conquering child. It is the æon of the individual. Muhammad is a Thelemic saint, and a new Kaaba is Boleskine House.

“Abrogate are all rituals, all ordeals, all words and signs. Ra-Hoor-Khuit hath taken his seat in the East at the Equinox of the Gods; and let Asar be with Isa, who also are one. But they are not of me. Let Asar be the adorant, Isa the sufferer; Hoor in his secret name and splendour is the Lord initiating.” –The Book of the Law I:49

Love is the law, love under will.



Given the subject matter I’m going to forgo the typical pleasantries.

I’ve watch a lot of videos about pedophiles getting caught and arrested. Stuff like To Catch a Predator. I find them cathartic seeing them be caught. People who without ambiguity deserve it. It’s a nice escape from the fucked up world we live in because it’s this little bubble of real world cases of people being stopped from being able to harm children. Every time they get out the handcuffs it’s a little moment of justice and it keeps my hopes up that there’s still good in the world and it’s worth fighting for. In this society so often the bad guy wins but in cases like this it’s nice to see the good guys win for a change, and outside of fiction to boot.

The demographics of what kind of people do this have been interesting. Never have any of them been women. Some of them have been gay. Plenty have been from all different ethnicities. However its only ever been men. I wonder why and I’d love to know the answer.

Throughout these videos, I’ve seen a disturbingly high number of times where they try to use Christianity as an excuse for their behavior or tried to use it as a distraction. No other religion has been used or even mentioned in all the hundreds of videos on this I’ve watched.

Beyond these videos, there’s been so many pedos who were church staff that got caught over the years that I’ve seen in the news. And there’s the whole thing about the Roman Catholic Church that I feel like I don’t even need to get into. So then, my question is, what is it about Christianity specifically that either creates or entices pedophiles? And why only ever men?

Concerning Allyship

Do what thou whilt shall be the whole of the law.

Part of being an ally is kicking toxic people out of your life. If one of your family members is queerphobic or otherwise discriminatory, then they’re not your family member, they’re an interloper. Reject them! That’s what allies need to start doing to actually make a difference. Don’t tolerate it to keep the peace. Rip a new asshole in the peace if you have to.

Simply being passively accepting isn’t good enough. You gotta socially isolate those who are agents for hatred and discrimination. You gotta fight back. Start arguments, kick people out, make a scene. Family ties be damned.

The paradox of tolerance is ever-present. In order to maintain a tolerant and accepting society, we must never tolerate those who are intolerant or we risk undoing all the progress we’ve achieved. Do not hesitate to do what’s right. Do not hesitate to call them out. Do not hesitate to rebuke them. Do not hesitate to kick them out of your lives forever. To hell with them! This is how we maintain and protect progress. Otherwise, they can erode the bonds that unite us.

Love is the law, love under will.

May the progress remain,