A Lust for Cis

Do what thou whilt shall be the whole of the law.

I wish I could hit reset on this life and be born as a cis girl. My life would have gone in a completely different direction but I’m ok with that.While I’ve finally gotten to a place in my life where I’m mostly ok, I would still trade all this in an instant to be cis. I hate being trans. I hate everything about it. There’s no upside. There’s no silver lining. It’s just pain. Constant horrible pain. It’s horrible and I hate it so much. Nobody would ever be trans on purpose. It’s nothing good. It feels like the gods decided to betray me before I was even born. It’s awful. There can be no wholly benevolent god in a world that’s got this kind of horror inside it. It’s fucked. Seriously fucked up. It’s awful. I’m so tired of it. I’m so fucking tired.

Love is the law, love under will.